Happy Mother's Day
This is my open letter to you on a day meant for you. I briefly considered a simple Facebook post with a photo of us with a caption saying how much I loved you. But it didn’t really feel like enough this year and I wanted to provide you with something more. Flowers weren’t an option because I’m a cheap ass and I hate spending money on something that will die in a few days.
First, I apologize for not being able to be with you on this day. I have been away from you for most Mother’s Day celebrations the past 12 years due to the choice I made to chase my career and life path after college. A choice which you’ve been supportive of and I’m very appreciative of your willingness to support the choices I’ve made. This marks my second Mother’s Day being outside of the USA in a row. I know this probably causes you extra heartache and loneliness as I’m physically farther away than when I was living in Arizona or California. I know you would love to spend the day with your sons instead of without us. Not being able to provide you with that opportunity does make my heartache too.
When I have those feelings I want you to know my thoughts of you are one of the things which bring warmth, love and happiness to it in a moment when it feels chilly. I hope the positive memories of the times we’ve shared together can cheer you up too today. I laugh thinking about the road trips across America in my truck by ourselves and with the two Grandmas, the laughs we’ve had during trips to Steamboat with unfortunate travel plan changes, and the time I made you give me a suppository in the hospital because I was too embarrassed to let a cute nurse do it.
I am extremely grateful to have been born as your son and I know Wayne feels the same way too. I’ve never been a perfect son by any means, but it is reassuring to know that in your eyes and heart I am a perfect son. Even with my weirdness and strange lifestyle choices to travel the world while you take care of Tez.
Over the past year, I’ve spent time working on how to open up my feelings and be more forward with you about how I feel. Sharing my true feelings for someone has always been a weakness of mine. I know I’m still a work in progress. For the last 365+ days of not physically being able to get together with you I feel closer to you than I have ever before. With that being said I want tell you loud and clear that I LOVE YOU!
Before I left for Vietnam last April you gave me two rocks. One rock with the word “Live” on it as a reminder to follow my dreams. The second rock has been the more important one as you told me it was your “heart” was drawn on it. Both of these rocks are always with me, but today and tonight the heart rock will be on my person all day and night in hopes when I touch it the love carries across the globe to your heart and makes you feel loved even more today.
Momma, I appreciate everything you’ve done for me. You are the sweetest, kindest and most loving soul I’ve ever been around. I hope that at some point in my life I’m able to harness and show that kind of love towards more people in my life, but most importantly I hope you’re able to feel that kind of love back from me. Thank you for all that you have done, still do and will continue to do for many-many years to come!
Love you lots! Jeremy, Spermy, Germ, #2